Moonlight
by Minniezadorbs
Summary: "Oh pet" he inhaled a shuddering breath "how could this have happened?". How hard would it be to remind his wife of the life she couldn't remember? Did he want to? (Do NOT skip the A/N)
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer**  
This is based on the characters and world created and owned by JK Rowling.

A/N: So I've been reading lots of memory fics lately and I LOVE them! So I thought I'd try one of my own. However this story has a MAJOR trigger. Postpartum depression is deeply explored in this fic so if that is not something you can handle please do not read. However, if you or someone you know is going through this please do seek resources to help. PD is real and it is very serious. Anyway, please be gentle. M because I like the word fuck and maybe I'll describe some sex. I dunno. I really like reviews so please please pleaseeee review if you like this. Thanks guys! 3

 _What the hell?_ Her legs moved across her sheets…no someone's sheets, because her own sheets were definitely cotton and these were definitely silk. She cracked an eye open and looked down at the bed she was lying in. The comforter and sheets were a rich chocolate colour and piled on top of her like someone had gotten out of bed next to her. She opened her other eye and sat up taking in her surroundings. Number one the bed was massive, really how many people slept here? Number two this was definitely not her room because she was sure she would never purchase such gaudy furniture and a ceiling vaulted that high was not in her living space budget. Whose house was this?! Why was it so quiet? Was she kidnapped? There was a dull ache between her legs that she hadn't felt before so maybe she'd had a one night stand?

She felt fine so she couldn't blame this on firewhiskey and moonlight was floating in through a large bay window so that would mean that if she'd had a one night stand the gentleman was still here somewhere since this was obviously his place and not hers. She looked down at herself and made a sound she didn't mean to but her attire was _shocking_. The "pajamas" she was wearing could barely be classified as underwear let alone clothing. It was literally a scrap of shiny satin pasted to her breasts and clinging to her stomach.

She didn't know how she got there but all in all it wasn't a bad place to wake up. However, she really should get back home. Ron and Harry would undoubtably be round tomorrow for a cuppa before work and although she wasn't sure what today was she was sure she had a lot of work to do tomorrow. She moved off the bed and searched the floor for her clothing but she couldn't find them anywhere, not even under the bed. There was a door to her right slightly open and just from a peek though the threshold she could see that it was a very large walk-in closet. She pushed into the room moving the door wider quietly to inspect the room.

It was divided in two halves one for a man and one for a woman. A woman?! Had she slept with a married man?! Oh Merlin please tell her she did not bed a married man like a common slag! Hanging on the man's side were unmarked work robes but the woman's robes were marked with the symbol for the Ministry for Magic's justice department. She leaned on the island in the middle of the room and blew a curl out of her face. Not only had she slept with a married man, she'd slept with one married to an obviously powerful woman. Oh shit! She worked in the Ministry's justice department! Was she her coworker?! Her boss?! She was a dead woman surely if this got out. She couldn't find her clothing so maybe she arrived in this? Bugger, she must have been feeling pretty sure of herself to have left her flat wearing a handkerchief. There were no answers in this closet that she could use immediately so she left the room and closed the door softly behind her.

She heard a small whimper, it sounded like a baby she mused as she shook her head. What kind of scum would have a one night stand with a baby in the house? She tiptoed to a large mahogany door on the left side of the room and pushed it open peeking in. There was a crib! A crib! Who was this creep?! How could she even be attracted to such a cad?! She slipped in and crossed the room as quietly as she could to make sure the babe was fine. She leaned over the railing of the absolutely ostentatious crib and let out a breath she didn't realize she'd been holding as she gazed down at the most beautiful child she'd ever seen.

The child looked up at her as he struggled to put his fist in his mouth. He couldn't have been more than a few weeks old, he was tiny. His lashes glistened with tears though he was no longer crying and atop his head was a sparse amount of soft white-blonde curls that jutted out all over the place. She scooped him gently into her arms and smiled down at those clear eyes. He looked so familiar. Had she seen him before? His name, Orion, was spelled out in glittering letters floating above his crib charmed to have stars zooming about the letters. His ceiling was charmed to look like the night sky and a centaur moved across his walls galloping majestically through the painted forest. Orion's father had spent a pretty sickle on this nursery.

"Well hello" she said quietly "you are just beautiful. Are you in here all alone? Oh what a sweet boy you are"

Orion's lip quivered and he kept rooting toward her breast as if she was nursing him, she felt her breasts tingling as if they were responding to his need

"Oh baby i'm not your mummy, I can't nurse you I'm sorry" She shifted the baby so that he could not search for her breast

As if he'd understood her, his eyes squeezed shut and he began to wail

"Oh shhh, shhh please" She pleaded, feeling more pressure in her breasts as if there was something in them for the babe to eat

"Daddy's coming Ry!" A very masculine voice floated into the room as the door widened, she heard the door but did not turn, she was still trying to calm the baby

"Oh mummy's got you" The voice behind her dropped in tone as if the speaker had relaxed

She'd almost dropped the child as her brain received the message from her ears. Mummy? _Mummy._ What the fuck?! Of all her questions that night, "what the fuck?!" was by far the most important. Without turning to meet the source of the voice, she gently set a still crying Orion in his crib, smiled weakly, and promptly fainted.

"Would it be appropriate to allow Ry to nurse? He's been due for a feeding"

"That should be fine dear, it won't hurt either of them"

As the babe, cradled in his father's hands, suckled and drank deeply from her, the woman groaned deeply and lifted a hand to her head before her eyes fluttered open. Her brain, in sequence registered the two blurred figures, the brightened room she had woken up in previously, and as if an afterthought, the baby sucking greedily from her breast. She calmly watched, her vision clearing, as the babe drew his last pull from her and his eyes fluttered shut as he fell into an after dinner slumber.

"Hermione, you're awake" the same masculine voice that had called to Orion now addressed her

Her eyes went from the sleeping baby to the owner of that voice and her mouth promptly fell open in a scream. A scream no one could hear because as soon as her mouth had opened a muffliato was cast as not to wake Orion.

"What has gotten into you?" He asked gently, searching her face with questioning eyes

"She's just fainted dear give her some time, Hermione darling have you been eating? You've just given birth four weeks ago you need to keep up your strength"

To their surprise Hermione started laughing hysterically, she nearly doubled over as she giggled and laughed at the short, thin woman. She swiped the tears from the corners of her eyes and sat back against the headboard.

"You are quite mistaken Miss. Whomever You Are. What has occurred here is somehow Draco Malfoy and I ended up in bed together. Probably the result of wine or maybe we even went on a date. I've woken up in whatever house he calls home and" she held up a hand palm forward, "not that i'm shocked because he is a right bastard, he is married with a child. If I could get my clothing and my shoes, I'll be happy to forget this ever happened" She smiled sweetly and pushed the comforter away from her legs to get out of bed

"Well, you are right" Draco began, rolling his eyes at her smug _aha!_ "I _am_ married and Orion is my son"

"What kind of foul, slimy, witless git are you?! Why would you bring me here! In your marital home! Oh Merlin!" She pulled at her hair and paced the room

Draco cleared his throat and shot her a pointed look, "As I was saying, Orion is my son and I share him with my wife, who coincidentally is _you_ "

She laughed again, "That's rich Malfoy" a snort followed, "but I am quite sure I would never marry you"

"What the hell is wrong with you?! We've been married for four years!"

"This isn't funny anymore Malfoy" She was getting angry now, she could get over having one night stand sex she couldn't remember but Malfoy was taking his teasing a bit too far

"It was never funny. I don't know what you're on about. You're doing my head in here!" He strained to keep his voice at an acceptable level as Orion was still sleeping in the middle of the bed Hermione had vacated

"I wake up in your house in the middle of the night and I don't know how you got me here but I'm doing _your_ head in?"

"You woke up here because you live here" He returned flatly

"Lovely. Look Malfoy, I feel like an absolute slag for even being here and dear Merlin I won't even mention that whole thing with your baby but I'll be going. Please don't try to contact me anymore" Hermione fled the room and bounded down the marble staircase intending to find a fireplace to floo back to her flat.

She found a grand fireplace in what looked like a sitting room and grabbed a handful of floo powder and called out her address. She brushed soot from her front as she stepped out of her fireplace and immediately registered the feeling of grime and debris under her bare feet.


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer**  
This is based on the characters and world created and owned by JK Rowling.

* * *

"What in the…." Hermione whispered to herself scanning the dark, musty room

The room was completely empty expect for a couple of boxes in a corner. This was absolutely not how she'd left her flat! It was warm, furnished, and cozy not cold, barren, and dusty from years of non use. There were no lights and when she carefully made her way to the hallway there weren't even doors on the two bedrooms.

"Hermione?" She heard him in what used to be her living room

"I don't understand" She muttered turning around to meet his eyes which softened at her distressed demeanor

"Please come home love" He took a couple of steps toward her but didn't attempt to embrace her

"This" Hermione gestured wildly "This is my home, did you do this? What have you done with my things?" her honey eyes were narrowed at him

"Pet I am not trying to deceive you, you are my wife. Orion came from you only a month ago. Don't you remember? Don't you feel anything for Ry? For me?" His voice was pleading and strained

"I don't know you Malfoy, not well anyway, and Orion is beautiful but he is not mine. How could I not remember bringing him into the world if I had?"

"I don't know Hermione but I am telling you the truth. We are married. Happily. Please just come home. Ry needs you. I promise to contact your friends in the morning and they can answer some questions for you if you'd like" Draco reached for her hand and reluctantly she allowed him to wrap his strong fingers around her own

"Just for tonight Malfoy and you'll set me back to rights in the morning?" she eyed him suspiciously

"I promise" he pulled her into him and with a pop they were back in the bedroom she'd run from earlier

"Could I maybe have a different set of pajamas?" Hermione asked quietly

He took her hand in answer and walked her back into the walk in closet she'd explored earlier

"All of these drawers belong to you, you usually store your pajamas in the third one down" He pointed to the left side of the island and backed out of the closet to allow her to change

She rooted through the drawers noting that most of the undergarments in there were indeed those of a nursing mother. She settled on a camisole and some loose fitting flannel pants noting, uncomfortably, that her stomach had seemed a bit stretched and her hips were much fuller than she'd remembered. Hermione climbed into Malfoy's bed and pulled the comforters up to her stomach.

"Did we actually, you know…?" She trailed off not meeting his gaze as her voice caught his attention

"What? Have sex? Well yes loads of times. In fact, that's the very reason Orion exists" he teased

She punched his arm and rolled her eyes, "I meant before I woke up, there's an ache down there that led me to believe maybe we'd been intimate"

"Oh no love that ache is due to the extra six pounds you brought into our lives. We can't have sex for two more weeks" he winked as he made himself comfortable next to her

"Where is he?" Hermione asked referring to the baby

"Mathilda brought him back to the nursery" his voice sounding tired and distant

"Who is she? We have a nanny?"

"No pet, she was your midwife. You gave birth to Ry right in there" he pointed to what she assumed was a bathroom a door's length down from the closet "she's been around helping you while you heal"

She said nothing more and instead turned away from him. Was he right? Was her body actually postpartum? The evidence was there but it just didn't add up. Hermione could not remember a single moment of the last, at least, four years.

* * *

A small groan escaped her as the shrill cries of a child permeated the stillness of the room. The babe sounded very close to her and his cries were literally making her head vibrate. She opened her eyes and sat up against the pillows lining the headboard. Orion was cradled in his father's arms next to her as the frazzled man pleaded with the angry infant.

"Please son…I know you're hungry" He was speaking to Orion so gently Hermione thought her heart might burst

"He's…hungry?" Hermione asked tentatively

"Yes, Mathilda went to fetch him some milk. You've been breastfeeding so we didn't have anything on hand" Draco gave her a side glance as he rocked the baby "I didn't want to further offend you by allowing him your breast"

Hermione chose not to respond and instead reached toward Draco to take Orion into her arms. His squealing quieted as he breathed in her scent and relaxed in her arms. She looked to Draco, startled, and he smiled at her.

"Only you can do that" He nudged her shoulder gently with his own

Hermione looked down at those clear hazel eyes and almost started wailing herself, the love she felt for this baby was inexplicable. She couldn't remember him but she definitely knew him in a way only a mother knows her child. She removed the camisole strap from her shoulder and allowed Orion to nurse from her chuckling softly at the greedy sounds he was making.

"How often does he eat?" she asked quietly

"Every two or three hours" Draco shrugged, at her incredulous look he supplied "he's a growing boy"

"Oh shut up" She rolled her eyes and launched a throw pillow at him

As Orion sucked greedily, Draco watched her marveling internally at how beautiful the witch beside him was. He had no idea what could have stolen her memories of their beautiful son and their happy marriage but he was damn sure going to find out. Until he could figure that out he would provide some choice memories in a pensieve so that she wouldn't be completely in the dark about her own life. Orion finished his meal with a tiny sigh that made Hermione laugh, a sweet tinkling sound that he'd heard so many times before she'd woken up without her memories.

"Mathilda will be round to bathe and dress him when she returns"

'No!" She hugged Orion to her chest and turned slightly away from Draco "He's mine isn't he? I'll do that myself"

Hermione had no idea where that surge of protection had arisen from within her but she was not about to hand over her baby to the midwife. Orion was hers and she would care for him herself.

"Sorry, its just that I want to do it. I may not remember but I've always wanted a child of my own and things like bathing him and clothing him are experiences I want for my own" she clarified at his questioning look "Where is my wand?"

"No need to apologize poppet. Your wand is on your bedside table"

Hermione cradled Orion in the crook of her right arm and reached for her wand with her left. She padded carefully to the bathroom, as not to drop Orion, and cast a warming charm on the chilly room. The bathroom was marvelous and almost every surface was covered in black granite with flecks of green and gold sparkling under the light. She turned the taps on the garden tub and watched as warm water poured from the spout. She gently divested Orion of his gown and nappy.

"Malfoy! Help?!"

Draco came running into the room looking around wildly, she assumed trying to locate the danger. She laughed at him and shook her head.

"I need you to hold the baby while I undress" She held the naked infant out to him

"Merlin don't frighten me like that" He took Orion into his arms and backed away slightly watching as she slipped out of her camisole and pants

Hermione lowered herself into the warm water and instantly felt better. The water was almost orgasmic to her tired body. She held her hands out for Orion and when Draco handed her the tiny boy she gently dipped him in the water.

"Do you like water Ry?" She cooed running her wet fingers through his curls

She was vaguely aware that Draco had not left the room and was watching her, arms crossed, leaning against the counter. A small smile ghosting his lips and adoration shining in those silver depths.

"Have I done this before?" She asked scooping water over the baby's tummy

"No" he answered softly "You had a hard time giving birth and you'd been quite out of sorts. We, ah…" he hesitated

She felt an odd pang behind her eyes like a memory was trying to push through so that she could recall but try as she might, she couldn't pull it forward. There was something in Draco's voice that told her she may not have been as attentive a mum as she'd like to believe.

"No matter" she shrugged "I'm doing it now" Orion cooed his approval as she massaged baby shampoo in his hair

"You are beautiful" Draco smiled, a genuine smile she never remembered ever seeing on him before "seeing you take care of my son is doing something to me"

"Well whatever that feeling is Malfoy" she squinted up at him "Cut it out"

He laughed at her and shrugged, "Being nice to you is quite the chore"

"You're not nice. Your teeth are literally made of snark" She leaned Orion against her chest so that she could capture his kicking feet with the washcloth

"You wound me" He gripped his chest dramatically and rolled his eyes

"Why did we choose the name Orion?" She asked suddenly

"Well my family has a tradition of constellation names so per your nature you scoured astronomy texts for weeks. You liked Orion the best so here he is, Orion Hunter Malfoy"

"Have we been out with him?"

"No" he shook his head, blonde locks slipping from his messy bun "we haven't taken him out yet. However, The Prophet is dying to see him" he gave a short laugh

"Only a month old and already a celebrity" She told Ry "Will you take him?" She held him up and out to his father

Draco grabbed a soft towel from the rack it had been hanging on and wrapped Ry carefully as he gathered the babe into his arms. Hermione used a bath pouf to lather herself and leaned back against the tub to savor the moment a bit before rinsing off. She took her heavy hair in her hands and washed it carefully as to avoid tangling the knotty strands. She stepped from the tub into the towel Draco held out to her and tried to ignore the salacious roam of his eyes over her glistening skin.

"You're such a cad" she rolled her eyes

"Ah but you enjoy it" he winked and followed her out of the bathroom

"Are all of these mine? Really?" She was back in the closet running her fingers through the richly coloured, luxurious fabrics

"Yes pet, I do enjoy spoiling you" he laughed from his position on the bed

She turned toward the door to throw a snippy remark but when her eyes landed on him tears pricked at the corners. He was sitting cross legged in the middle of the bed drying Ry carefully as if the child was made of porcelain. He was humming softly to the babe, smiling and rubbing his pointed nose on the Ry's button one. This was no Draco Malfoy, at least not the one she had known through school. The man sitting on that bed would not be capable of letting Death Eaters into Hogwarts, the man rubbing noses with his infant son could not have let a madman brand him, the man on that bed could actually be a man she'd marry.

She turned back to the closet and took a yellow sundress down from the closet rod. The dress was soft and shimmery with a hem that seemed to float. She slipped it on and gasped at the flattering way it fit her body. The hem floated at her calves and the cinched waist pulled her in, which she was ever grateful for. The thin straps were perfect for when Ry needed to nurse and the sweetheart neckline didn't dip too low keeping the dress demure and classy. She found a pair of jeweled sandals and slipped her feet in, noticing that her nails were painted pale pink instead of the bright green she remembered. She frowned but pressed on to the dressing table to dry and style her still wet hair. She waved her wand over her head watching as a charm sparkled down and dried her hair. She uncorked a bottle labeled Sleekeazy's Hair Potion and smoothed a dollop into her rapidly frizzing strands. As her hair relaxed she began running a brush through it and used a charm she'd learned from _Madame Jezhilda's Beauty Charms for the Modern Woman_ to pull her hair into a chignon. Satisfied with her hair she began rooting through the drawers to find out what sorts of things she liked now. She found some muggle makeup products and perfumes and a small book of charms from everything from longer lashes to fuller lips. In the end she settled on darkening her lashes and glossing her lips with a sheer cherry coloured gloss. She had foregone the perfume knowing Orion's skin was still sensitive and delicate and she'd planned to hold him close to her all day. She was absolutely obsessed with the feel of the babe in her arms and against her chest as their hearts beat in tandem.

When she stepped into the room dressed and groomed neatly she saw the cutest sight she'd ever remembered seeing. Draco was leaning against the headboard with his head titled back and his eyes closed, Orion laid on his chest starkers sleeping contentedly. She took the opportunity to observe the Draco she had apparently married. His features were the same as they'd always been; strong, pointed and aristocratic. His hair was cropped low on the sides and longer on top as it was currently pulled into a messy bun. He was built strong and lean with muscles sculpted out of his creamy skin. The former dark mark was faded and red but not very noticeable unless you had known it was there. His hands were as nice as they'd always been and only two rings adorned his fingers. His wedding band glittered on his left, the Malfoy signet on his right. He was handsome but that was never a question. The question was how did he manage to grab hold of her heart?

Deciding it was time to get Ry dressed she crossed the room and entered his luxurious nursery to find his clothing. She opened his armoire and found an array of clothing that no baby should even own. What sort of social life did he have to own all of these clothes? She laughed reminding herself that Orion was the son of an obscenely rich man and as such he'd always live his life in excess same as Draco. Once she'd picked out an outfit she heard the beginning of Orion's fussing.

"No fussing Ry, mummy's here" She sing-songed entering her bedroom once again

"I didn't mean to drift off with him" Draco's voice was husky with sleep and the tone heated her cheeks

"Its fine, he needs his rest to grow into mummy's big boy don't you Ry" She nuzzled Ry's cheeks with her own as she spoke

"I must say pet, you're going to make me melt" Draco grinned at her

Hermione returned his grin as she carried Orion off to his nursery. She settled into a plush rocking chair and removed one of her dress straps to nurse her fussy babe. Draco appeared in the doorway a few minutes after Orion had started eating and leaned against the frame.

"I'd like to share something with you after you've finished with him. Do you remember where my study is?"

She shook her head in the negative and he continued, "Downstairs. The french doors off the kitchen"

"Okay" she acquiesced "I'll meet you"

* * *

A/N: FFn's formatting is the bane of my existence *eyeroll* I have most of this written already but its one huge document. Please let me know if the way i'm breaking them off seems odd. Thanks and happy reading!


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer**  
This is based on the characters and world created and owned by JK Rowling.

A/N: Sexy seas ahead mateys!…I'm sorry. I don't know why I'm like this.  
Also, thank you guys for all the follows! Warms my little heart.

* * *

Hermione rocked and nursed until Orion had fallen into a contented slumber. She put a nappy on him, dressed him gently and laid him down in his crib to continue his morning nap. She trailed her fingers along the walls and over portraits as she wandered the richly decorated home. As she neared the study she could hear his voice and another's in what sounded like a floo-call. She got a bit closer but made sure to stay out of sight as she listened.

"Not a thing, she doesn't even remember giving birth" Draco's voice informed the listener

"Well that may not be so bad considering" Harry! She smiled, he had kept his promise to contact someone familiar to her

"You should see her with Ry, she's been doting on him" Draco returned

"Really?!" Harry sounded surprised, why was that surprising? She wondered with a frown

"Could you come round today? She'd love a face she doesn't remember hating"

"We'll be round for lunch. You know what I like Malfoy"

"Shove it up your arse Potter"

Harry's laughter died out as Draco ended the call. She stepped back and composed herself then she moved forward to push through the french doors of his study. The room was all mahogany and green with a massive desk and a leather set of couches and chairs. In the middle of his desk sat a marble pensieve. Was he going to share a memory with her? She sure hoped so because if there was anything in the world she hated it was not knowing something. Especially when the thing she had no idea about was her own life.

"Wife" he greeted as he noticed her "come here" He held his hand out to her

She took his hand and let him guide her around his desk. He took a seat in his chair and pulled her into his lap breathing in her scent as he wrapped his strong arms around her waist.

"What day is it?" Hermione inquired trying to keep her eyes off of what looked like professional paperwork littering the desk

"Sunday"

"Are we in Malfoy Manor" she asked

"No. I'd never bring you there. We've built this home in Southampton. You like the beaches here. More modest than the manor, only eleven bedrooms and two stories."

"Oh yes very modest" she replied sarcastically "but thank you, for building this for us"

"Anything for you love, absolutely anything" he smiled

She patted the hand resting on her waist and returned his smile.

"Oh pet" he inhaled a shuddering breath "how could this have happened?"

She knew he wasn't asking her but she answered anyway, "did I maybe hurt my head?"

"No love, no injuries" he chuckled softly

"There is something you aren't telling me"

"Yes pet there is, however I think that information may hurt more than it would help"

"Were we happy?"

"Yes, very. You are the best thing that has ever happened to me Hermione" he kissed her shoulder softly, pleased when she didn't shy away from him

"You sure have a lot of sweet names for me"

He laughed, "I don't like your name. Too long"

"Oh shut up" She swatted at his chest laughing

"Ry was not your first pregnancy. The first time we tried you miscarried eight weeks in and it took quite the toll on you. Orion was conceived, unplanned, three months later" He admitted, his cheek pressed against her back

"How unfortunate" she frowned having no memory of the event

"Miscarriages aren't uncommon but they are unpleasant. I'd never seen you cry like that" He thought that perhaps he was oversharing but he couldn't stop himself

"I'm sure I'd grown attached by the eighth week. I can't remember the feeling but I know it must have been heartbreaking for us" She turned toward him and placed a hand on his cheek

"I know you don't remember but I love you. I really do" He smiled then pressed his lips to her wrist

"Have you always been so affectionate?" It sounded like a joke but he knew she was sincerely asking

"Only with you"

"The pensieve?" She asked

"I can show you something. Of course, it would be as I remember but true all the same" He gestured to the marble bowl

She was quiet for a moment but she'd known the memory she wanted as soon she saw the bowl, "show me us in love"

He laughed softly, "Your wish is my command pet"

* * *

 _A half filled wine glass sailed past his head narrowly missing him and staining his blonde hair burgundy in spots. She was fuming and her magic was crackling around her like a electric aura. He was equally angry and stared at her through the narrow slits his eyes had become._

 _"_ _If I'm so damn_ difficult _please feel free to leave!" she screeched at him itching to grab her wand and hex him six ways from Sunday_

 _"_ _You know what? I will. Fuck this! Fuck your friends! Fuck the pretty little life you're trying to create! FUCK. YOU!" he roared_

 _Another wine glass flew his way. Seriously? How many of those things were in her reach!?_

 _"_ _Fuck me!? Fuck YOU Malfoy! You death eating pretentious arsehole!"_

 _"_ _Oh there it is! There it is" He clapped sarcastically "I was wondering how long it would be before I was a death eater. Newsflash princess, I was a_ former _death eater when I was fucking you too"_

 _"_ _I faked it!" She returned, her entire face a startling shade of red_

 _"_ _Oh please mudblood. You faked it and I'm a squib" he rolled his eyes_

 _"_ _Eight months" She huffed "Eight months of fighting. What the hell are we doing!? This isn't healthy!"_

 _"_ _If you'd stop trying to turn me into a damn Hufflepuff we'd get along fine!"_

 _"_ _I'm doing no such thing!" She returned indignantly_

 _"_ _I'm not nice Hermione! I'm not reformed" He held up his fingers in air quotes "I'm still an arsehole! I still think your friends are losers! The ONLY thing that has changed is that I'm in love with you! Stupid woman!" He was so deep into his rage he didn't even register that he'd told her he loved her a full two months earlier than he'd planned_

 _His chest was heaving, her chest was heaving but there was something in her eyes that told him he no longer had to worry about dishes being launched at him. She launched her body instead and flew into his arms delivering a bruising kiss. She bit and sucked at his lips whispering_ I'm sorry's _between fevered kisses._

 _He returned his own apologies and he squeezed her bum through her leggings. He lifted her over his shoulder, carried her to her bedroom, and deposited her on the bed. He was staring at her through half-lidded eyes the grey in them heating to mercury and she was looking up at him with an adoration he'd never seen._

 _He grabbed the front of her leggings and dragged them off her legs lifting her up in the process. She giggled at his roughness and her smile made his cock jump against his trousers. They were both naked five minutes later. He lay on top of her kissing every inch of her face, dragging his full lips over her heated skin, Merlin be damned he was going to devour this witch._ His witch. _He sucked hard on her nipples and raked his fingernails down her sides to dig into her hips. Her moans made him impossibly hard and his tip wept down her thighs as he dug his teeth into her flesh, marking her. He moved further down her body to plunge his tongue between her soaking folds. He sucked mercilessly on her clit until she toppled hard over the edge into an intense orgasm._

 _He hovered over her searching her face as if he was trying to memorize every feature. He entered her and set a slow pace maintaining eye contact with her as he moved inside her._

 _"_ _You're in love with me" She breathed as she writhed beneath him_

 _"_ _Stupid woman" he laughed as he captured her lips once more_

* * *

"Oh my" She pressed her fingers to her lips after she'd withdrawn from the pensieve

"Too much?" He asked sheepishly

"No!…no. I mean, it was okay" she laughed nervously

He laughed at her, his gray eyes darkening to the same mercury from his memory. She was doing a number on him dressed in that pretty yellow sundress and her full bum perched on his lap was not helping either. She was observing him from beneath her lashes watching as his hands rubbed her knees and his tongue darted out to wet his lips. He moved his hands slowly up her legs, gently squeezing her thighs.

"Can I kiss you wife? Please?" He pleaded softly

She responded with a nod in the positive and held her breath as he moved toward her face and pressed his full lips against her own. He groaned involuntarily relishing in the feel of her cherry slicked mouth. She didn't really know how to respond to his kiss but by the time she moved he was pulling away from her, a contented smile on his face.

"Maybe we can take Ry out" she blurted, feeling a bit uncomfortable

"If you'd like" he murmured brushing his lips against her collarbone "Mother will be cross with you however"

"Why" her brow furrowed

"She's been begging you to let her throw him a proper debut"

"I've declined?"

"Several times"

She laughed at that knowing that Narcissa shouldn't really have expected any other answer from her.

"Who keeps Orion while I work?" She stood, unable to ignore his wandering hands any longer

"You haven't been to work since his birth but Mathilda helps" Draco frowned at the loss of her warmth

"I see, so Ry really tuckered me out then?"

"You could say that" He said lightly not wanting his tone to hint at anything more

"Well was I at least talking about going back to work?"

"You'd planned a January return. Its November twentieth today. Ry's birthday is October ninth."

"I really should go check on him" She moved toward the door, suddenly irritated with everything she didn't know

Her walk back to Orion's nursery was quiet, she wasn't sure she even wanted to think. Draco was obviously hiding something from her but she couldn't begin to imagine what. If he was cordial with Harry then he hadn't tricked her into the marriage so it had to be about Orion but what could it be? Her heart swelled whenever she was near Ry but maybe he hadn't come from her, maybe he was adopted! Maybe the physical pain she felt was from her miscarriage and Draco was trying to spare her feelings. He would think her too fragile to know that her baby had been lost and they'd adopted Orion instead. She smiled triumphantly sure that she had figured the secret out. She shook her head as she gazed down at the still sleeping babe, they needn't have kept that from her if that were the case, she was okay with an adopted child and she would love him as though he'd come from her. She resolved to ask Harry when he arrived later that day. Harry wouldn't lie to her.


	4. Chapter 4

**Disclaimer**  
This is based on the characters and world created and owned by JK Rowling.

A/N: Silly Mione! Trust muva writer my reader babies!  
Also this chap may make you a bit squeamish but I don't think it's _too_ bad.

* * *

 _"_ _Golden slumbers kiss your eyes, smiles await you when you rise"_ Hermione's melodious voice floated out of the nursery into the hallway

"Told you" Draco whispered smugly

"This is great, she's glued to him. She wouldn't even touch him if she wasn't feeding him before"

"I know, she's been like this with him since last night. I almost wish her memory would stay gone"

"Look at the mum Ry has right now its amazing"

"Shut up, she's coming"

"Hermione!" Harry held out his arms as Hermione appeared in the hallway cradling a wiggling baby

"Harry! Oh Harry! I'm so happy to see you!" She rushed forward and turned sideways into Harry's hug as not to crush Orion

"I'm happy to see you as well" Harry smiled wide at her

"Have you met Orion yet?"

"Oh yeah, Ry and I are good friends. His dad's a tosser but Ry's a good bloke" Harry laughed and dodged a good hearted punch from Hermione

"Ginny is going to hex us if we don't deliver Hermione to the garden" Draco interrupted with a roll of his eyes

He hesitantly placed a hand on the small of Hermione's back and led her to the stairs. He planted a kiss atop Orion's head and did not miss the smile that ghosted over Hermione's lips at his action.

"What?" He asked

"I love how you love him" She shrugged. He winked at her and pushed open the glass doors to the garden

Ginny Potter stood from her chair but not to greet Hermione, she stood to yell at her sons who were currently rolling in the grass locked in, what looked like, a hug but far more aggressive than any hug should be. When Ginny turned toward Hermione a very pregnant belly dominated her front.

"Mione!" Ginny rushed forward and kissed her cheek instead of hugging her as it would have been awkward with Orion and her belly

"Hello Gin" Hermione smiled congenially and moved to sit at the outdoor dining table

"How are you? Malfoy's told us about your situation" Ginny reached for Hermione's hand and squeezed her fingers

"Harry and I will be in my study" Draco's voice was in Hermione's ear before she could respond to Ginny

"Okay" She nodded and once he and Harry were back in the house she turned to Ginny, "Why is everyone acting so odd?!"

Ginny was visibly startled by her outburst and her brow furrowed, "what do you mean?"

"Draco is acting like me giving Ry a bath should be a national holiday, Harry was surprised, _surprised_ to hear that I was even _touching_ him. He's not mine isn't he? Go ahead and admit he's adopted. Draco told me about the miscarriage, I've already figured out that Orion isn't mine" She had really meant to ask Harry but the question was burning a hole in her tongue

Ginny threw her head back in a hearty laugh that lasted several minutes "I thought you'd lost your memory not your mind"

"What's so funny" Hermione huffed

"Orion is 100 percent yours Mione. Well he's 50% Malfoy unfortunately. I distinctly remember your middle protruding as far out as mine and I was in this very house when he was born" she patted Hermione's knee in an attempt at comfort

"Then what is he hiding?" Hermione pushed, relieved that her assumptions about Ry were incorrect

"Nothing Mione! You're just out of sorts right now" Ginny shook her head

"How could it be possible for me to forget all of this? Orion is so wonderful" Hermione beamed down at her baby who was occupied with sucking three of his fingers

"Have you been to your library yet? Maybe there's a book that could help?"

"My librar…I have a library?!" She almost jumped from her seat

"You mean to tell me _Hermione Granger_ didn't immediately think to consult a book?" Ginny laughed so hard her belly began to bounce

"Oh very funny" Hermione scrunched her face at the redhead "Orion's kept most of my attention since last night. I cant seem to tear myself away from him. Is this how you felt with the boys?"

"Of course, that's totally normal. What's not normal is how often I'm pregnant" Ginny rolled her eyes

"I could teach you a contraception spell" Hermione offered with a grin

"Because it worked so well for you?" She nodded at Orion

"Draco said he we'd been trying for a baby" Hermione poked her tongue at the redhead

"As it stands I must respectfully decline" Ginny joked holding a hand up

"How was it, after the miscarriage?" Hermione asked softly rubbing Ry's cheek with her index finger

"Hard. Understandably so. Orion came so soon afterward, we worried that you hadn't healed properly…you know, emotionally"

"I'm quite sure this beautiful little face was all I needed to set me back to rights" Hermione hadn't lifted her gaze to Ginny but if she had she'd have seen the somber expression dominating the redhead's features

"Are you hungry? I can fetch the boys for lunch if you'll keep an eye on Albus and James" Ginny shook her head attempting to physically remove the expression she knew she wore and stood

"Yes that'd be great" Hermione turned her attention to the two boys chasing each other through the hedges

* * *

"We should tell her" Harry knocked back the last of his firewhiskey

"We should" Draco agreed, the rim of his glass rested on his chin after he'd taken his own sip

"She thought he was adopted" A female voice added from the doorway

"You're kidding?!" Harry jerked his head toward his wife

"I told she was nutters if she believed that but she knows Malfoy's hiding something from her"

"Its only been a day" Draco rolled his eyes at his wife's intuitiveness

"That's Mione" Harry laughed

"Shall we have lunch?" Ginny asked crossing her arms and tapping her foot expectantly

"We shall" Draco stood from his chair and Harry followed suit, their glasses left emptied on the desk

Lunch passed without consequence, Hermione didn't ask anymore questions content with general conversation about Ginny and Harry's boys, the little girl arriving in two months time, and how delicious the treacle tarts were. Harry and his family departed later that afternoon and Hermione was grateful for the visit. While she truly felt foolish for doubting her own motherhood, she knew something was not right. Evening found her in Orion's nursery feeding him his last meal after a warm bath and Draco downstairs in his study preparing several missives to owl the next morning. After she'd pressed a kiss to Ry's curls and laid him gently in his crib she made her way downstairs to join Draco in his study.

His hair was free down his back and his head was inclined downward as he dragged the quill purposefully across the parchment. He looked up at her and a smile pulled the corners of his mouth upward.

"I thought you'd be finding your way to the library by now" he joked pushing aside the parchment

"In a moment, but first I'd like to ask something of you" She squeezed her right hand in her left as she looked at everything in the room but him

"Ask away pet" He leaned back in his chair and caught her gaze as she attempted to focus on his shirt

"Show me his birth" She held his gaze and burned his irises with her own, what Ginny had told her was well and good but she needed proof

Draco retrieved his wand from the corner of his desk and pulled the memory, a heavy line of silver, from his temple. He deposited the memory in the pensieve now sitting on a pedestal to the left of his desk and stepped backward so that she could access it. She gripped the sides of the bowl, filled her lungs with desperately needed oxygen, and dipped her head into the waiting memory. 

* * *

_The water was clear and, if the steam settled above the tub was any indication, very hot. Her belly was so large that it protruded out of the water, the taut skin seemingly stretched to its limits. Hermione's chest heaved as she hissed through her teeth. Draco sat behind her in the tub pressing his fingers into the small of her back, his long legs stretched out on either side of her, bent so that she could rest her hands on his knees._

 _"_ _You are amazing witch" he whispered against her ear_

 _"_ _I hate you" She ground out as another contraction tore through her abdomen_

 _He laughed, a deep, rumbling sound that vibrated the cheek his face rested against_

 _"_ _Let me check you dear" Mathilda's voice reached her ears and she lifted her head from Draco's shoulder to meet the old witch's eyes_

 _The woman's hand dipped below the waters service, her face expressionless as she gently pressed her fingers on what felt very much like a head_

 _"_ _Its time" Her blue eyes snapped to Hermione's as she removed her hand_

 _"_ _Oh but I'm not ready! Draco I'm not ready!" Hermione squeaked backing into her husband's hard chest and away from Mathilda_

 _"_ _Its okay pet relax" Draco's voice was low, his hands rubbing her arms affectionately_

 _"_ _If you'd like I could cast a simple.."_

 _"_ _No!" Hermione cut the woman off aggressively "I want to feel everything"_

 _"_ _Focus on my voice pet, breathe my love" Draco cooed into her ear as Mathilda spread her legs_

 _"_ _I'll need you to push Mrs. Malfoy, let your body guide you" Mathilda's voice was clear and loud_

 _The pain from the first push as her baby passed her cervix was blinding and unlike anything she'd ever experienced. Her mouth fell open as a scream ripped up her throat from deep in her belly. Fire consumed her legs and she involuntarily kicked a leg out, her foot connecting with the tub painfully. Draco looked so sorry for her pain but he knew that there was nothing he could do but offer comfort and hold her steady as she brought their child into the world._

 _Draco whispered affirmations into her ears and she pushed, crying and screaming. Her body felt like it was being ripped in half and she could feel her baby as it descended. The experience was breathtaking and excruciating all at once. Her throat was raw and her screams hoarse as she forced her body to release her baby and soon her screams were replaced with the baby's cries as it made it's debut. The water bloomed red and her head fell back against Draco's shoulder as she sobbed. Draco's hands held a squirming, screaming form in front of her but her vision was blurred with tears and the energy had been throughly zapped from her._

 _"…_ _Boy…" reached her consciousness although she was sure something both preceded and followed that statement. She simply smiled and let her eyelids drop as darkness consumed her._

 _When she woke, she was dry and dressed in a gauzy cotton gown. As she weakly pulled her body into a sitting position she noticed Draco sitting next to the bed in an armchair._

 _"_ _Sweetheart" Her voice rasped from her lips, scratchy and quiet_

 _"_ _A boy love, we have a boy" he smiled and offered the child in his arms to her_

 _"_ _A boy" She repeated_

 _Draco frowned at the emptiness in her tone as she held her arms out awkwardly to accept the baby she'd birthed_

 _"_ _Hello" She smiled down at the babe but the smile didn't quite reach her eyes_

 _"_ _Beautiful isn't he? He's got your eyes" Draco supplied_

 _A strange feeling settled in her chest as she gazed down at the child, who'd they'd agreed to name Orion Hunter if the baby was a boy three weeks ago. He was asleep, his tiny chest rising and falling as he breathed. She waited for the love to bloom in her heart but the feeling did not come. Even as she stroked his soft curls and traced the shells of his ears the feeling did not come. Try as she might she could not attach herself to the miracle in her arms almost letting the thought that she was betraying her first child seep into her mind. Draco watched her curiously with a tilt of his head trying and failing to assess what she was thinking. The baby fidgeted and let loose a loud whine that had Mathilda running into the room._

 _"_ _Oh you're awake! Good! Lets try to get him his first meal, yeah?" Mathilda spoke as she rushed to Hermione's side_

 _She offered the midwife a weak smile and lowered her gown to offer Orion Hunter her breast. Draco joined her on the bed and as soon as his arm settled around his wife's shoulders, the most tortured cry he'd ever heard wretched itself from his wife. Tears ran down her face as she sobbed…_

* * *

Hermione pulled her head from the bowl and backed away so abruptly that the pensieve toppled from the pedestal and shattered. Draco, startled by her reaction, rushed toward her and caught her as her body failed to hold her up. She crumpled, sobbing, in his arms. He knew then what she must have seen, he just hoped that Orion would not pay for it.

He rubbed circles against her back and rocked back and forth on the floor of his study holding his own tears back for his wife's sake. He'd cried on this floor many times since Orion's birth. Every time she walked past the nursery like it wasn't there, every time she pushed Orion away when he was offered to her, every time she started blankly ahead as the baby sucked from her breast. He would "retire" to his study, sit on the floor with a bottle of firewhiskey and cry. For his wife, for his son, and for himself.


	5. Chapter 5

**Disclaimer**  
This is based on the characters and world created and owned by JK Rowling.

A/N: You guys don't let us take any liberties in fan-fiction do you? Lol.  
Enjoy this chapter my babies. I know I've only touched on the D/Hr relationship but trust me this is as much a part of this fic as Hermione's motherhood.

This chapter is absolutely dedicated to **_Green Eyed Lana Lee_**. Thank you for your kind words honey. I got my lazy ass off my couch just to turn this out for you.

* * *

Two weeks after Draco comforted his wife on the floor of his study they had fallen into a routine that, he felt, Hermione developed from a need to overcompensate. She spend every moment with Orion and refused to be away from him during waking hours. The only time his poor son had a break from his overbearing mother was when he was asleep and even then Hermione hovered over his crib with a creepy smile pulling her lips toward her ears.

The day after he'd shown her the memory of Ry's birth she'd been off kilter and eerily quiet but that night as he laid next to her she'd confessed that she felt like she didn't deserve Orion. He was worried that she'd ask more questions to discover the depth of her detachment but she did not. In fact after that day she hadn't spoken another word about it and set to smothering Orion with affection, attention and tender care. Draco was thankful and happy for her response but he seriously worried about the state of his wife's fragile mind.

As he sat in his office in the Ministry, readying himself to go before the Wizengamot, he tried to push his wife to the back of his mind. He would deal with that later but right now he had to focus on keeping a man out of Azkaban.

* * *

Narcissa Malfoy's lips pursed as she pressed a brief kiss to Orion's forehead before handing him back into his mum's waiting hands. A perfectly arched eyebrow went up toward her hairline as she watched Hermione set about preparing her tea with one hand as she balanced Orion against her chest with the other. She'd always thought the young woman was a peculiar girl and it seemed her thoughts were confirmed as the brunette bit her lip leaning forward to sugar her tea. A proper lady would not be taking tea with so much sugar Narcissa thought to herself lifting her own _lightly_ sweetened tea to her mouth.

"I apologize" Hermione spoke as she looked up at the Malfoy matriarch "for my disposition today. Had I known you'd be calling on the manor I'd have summoned Mathilda to help me"

"No matter" Narcissa's two-toned curls bounced as she shook her head "I was worried"

"Then you know? Everyone knows?" the young woman's voice was brittle and strained as she asked

"No not everyone dear. Only those who matter"

"Why are you okay with this?" Hermione's suddenly narrowed eyes took Narcissa aback

"Childbirth is serious dear I would never presume to…"

"I meant Draco and I" Hermione cut the older witch off

"Oh, yes. That" Narcissa's piercing eyes cut into Hermione "You found my son during a very trying time in his life. If not for you he might've been beyond the veil"

"What?" Hermione frowned

"My son had taken to…abusing a certain potion, capable of dampening his emotions. My boy was out of sorts all the time, refusing to feel anything. I suppose you were the necessary catalyst" Narcissa barely lifted her shoulder in a small shrug

"So this was not some fairytale then? The pureblooded prince didn't sweep the poor Muggle-born off her feet?" the sarcasm in her question, Narcissa thought bitterly, was very improper for the lady of the manor

"It was you who swept the prince Mrs. Malfoy" Narcissa returned tightly

"He's been sharing some of his memories with me but I've broken the pensieve"

"That pensieve has been in our family for generations! How could you have broken it?!" Narcissa's composure was completely lost at the news that a treasured relic had been destroyed

"I'm sorry! He'd shown me Orion's birth and I couldn't finish the memory. I supposed the force of my withdrawal was too much" tears began to stain the brunette's face as she explained

"Oh dear, why would he have shown you that?!"

"I asked. I thought Orion was adopted and I wanted proof that he was mine" Hermione sobbed

"You poor girl" Narcissa reached forward and grasped Hermione's shaking hand

"What's wrong with me? Who am I now?!"

Narcissa, uncharacteristic of her usual demeanor, bit back a tear at the sight of Hermione's agony. She gently lifted Orion from his sobbing mother and placed him in the Moses basket at her feet. Then, against her best judgement, she gathered the brunette in her arms and hugged her as she cried.

* * *

His magic blew the lamps lining the mental heath ward of St. Mungo's as he stormed through the halls, a small nurse running behind him, begging him to calm down. The door to her room opened before he'd gotten within a foot of it and Ginny Potter came walking out, her hand outstretched to slow his stead.

"Where is my wife Potter?!" He stopped short of her hand, not wanting to brush past lest he knock the pregnant woman off her feet

"She's fine Malfoy, your mother just wanted to have a few tests done. Hermione had a bit of breakdown this afternoon" She squeezed her index and thumb together to indicated how small she wanted him to think 'a bit' was

"My mother is here? Where's Ry?" Draco looked around Ginny into the room that held his wife

"With Mathilda. Hermione's having a right freak out about that" Ginny rolled her eyes

Before Draco could answer a healer came strolling out of the room, a quill tucked into her severe bun.

"Mr. Malfoy. A word?" The healer's voice was as severe as her bun

"Yes, please, whats going on with my wife? Is she okay?"

"Mr. Malfoy I performed a rather strong memory charm on Mrs. Malfoy and it had no effect. Using a bit of _medical_ legilimency" she made sure to emphasize the word medical "I can see her memories. Oddly they seem suspended in her subconscious as though something is holding them just out of her reach. She cannot recall them and I cannot pull them forward. They're there Mr. Malfoy and they're not. I'm afraid she won't be getting them back." the healer shook her head sadly and gave his shoulder an awkward pat that he assumed she meant to be comforting

"What am I to do then?" Draco asked, his tone soft and defeated

"I suppose, Mr. Malfoy, that you could make new memories" the healer gave him one more awkward pat and moved around him to go the opposite way down the hall

"Draco?" His mother's voice lifted his downcast gaze

"They're gone mother. Her memories are gone."

"Oh Draco that's not the end of the world. We can move forward from this"

"What if she leaves? If she doesn't remember loving me then it would be easy for her to take my son and go" Draco's eyes shone with unshed tears

"Love does not live in our minds son, it lives in our hearts" Narcissa stepped forward and embraced her only son her own heart breaking as he fisted her robes and held her tight

* * *

"Alright there love, can I get you anything?"

"No Draco, I'm fine. I've just checked on Ry and I think I'll be tucking in for the night"

"We could get a second opinion if you'd like" He joined her in bed and reached for her hand

"Do you really think we should be pursuing those memories?" She asked quietly

"They're not all bad. There's four years of love, laughter, routine, and friendship in there" he rubbed a thumb against the soft skin of her palm

"I suppose you're right. I just…what if I remember the kind of mum I was to Ry and I can't handle that?

"This time I'll carry it with you" Draco pressed a kiss to her forehead then pulled her against his chest

"You're a sweet husband. Tell me about our first date" she snuggled into him and closed her eyes

"I could tell you, or I could show you" he smirked though she couldn't see his face from her position

"But I've broken the pensieve"

"I know darling. Tell me, do you like Italy in the summer?" 

* * *

"You've taken her memories?!" his voice boomed and his white beard shook against his chest

"No! No, I've simply placed them out of her reach" she shrank back as she explained

"Why would you do that?!"

"She asked me to! She stood right in her garden and asked me to help her love her baby!" she shot back, agitated that her father was questioning her judgement

"We do not tamper with the memories and minds of those who pray to us!"

"Yes, yes but how else was I going to do it? Besides I only wanted to hide a little of her memories. I was a little heavy handed with my magic"

"Gaiea remove yourself from my sight! And fix this! You've made a terrible misstep!" Her father dismissed her and as soon as she popped away from his sight she stamped her foot and screamed into the sky

The truth was she had no idea how to fix what she'd done but the woman was crying so wretchedly! She'd wanted to love that baby so badly! Gaiea knew she'd done the right thing in helping but, she supposed, she needed to repair the woman's mind and give her back her memories. She popped away again and landed in her grandmother's realm. The old woman would surely have the answers.


	6. Chapter 6

**Disclaimer**  
This is based on the characters and world created and owned by JK Rowling.

A/N: The reception to this story has been amazing. Thank you so much my babies! This chapter is short but it is very necessary. We'll pick up where we left 5 off in chapter 7.

* * *

 _They stood toe to toe, magic electrifying the air around them, chests heaving and faces red._

 _"_ _Is it me?! Am I the reason you cannot love him?" Draco's voice was hard and accusing_

 _"_ _How dare you! I do love him!" Hermione crossed her arms closing herself off_

 _"_ _You won't touch him! You hardly look at him!"_

 _"_ _I'm just tired is all" Her voice was small and weak_

 _"_ _Thats bullshit and you know it! You can't love him because you can't love me. Not really. You love me because I was your most successful pet project"_

 _Her hand connected with his cheek so swiftly she wasn't sure she had hit him at first. He stood wide eyed and quiet. She turned and ran from the room before he could properly respond. Bare feet carried her down the stairs, through the kitchen and out the side door into the rose garden. Hermione plucked a rose that hadn't bloomed yet and fingered the velvety exterior of the sleeping petals. Tears blurred her vision as she began to cry and no sooner had she started than horrible sobs began clawing their way out of her belly._

 _Why couldn't she love her son the way other mothers loved their babies? She shied away from him, rejected the feel of his skin on hers as if he were made of fire. No mother should feel so indifferent toward a baby that came out of her own body. She was the brightest witch of her age, she helped Harry Potter defeat the darkest wizard of all time and she was climbing the Ministry ladder faster than anyone else from her class so how was it that she could not figure out how to show love to her own baby properly. It was not that she did not love Orion Hunter, far from that! It was that she could not attach herself to him and enjoy being his mother._

 _Her first pregnancy had found her so happy and overjoyed! She would sit in bed with her husband and chuck names into the air wrinkling her nose at his suggestions. She had wished for a little girl that she could name Persephone or Cassiopeia. She stopped eating sugary things and shepard's pie as it was much too fattening and enjoyed the glow of her skin as their child grew in her womb._

 _She'd screamed, a heart stopping gut wrenching sound that tore her husband out of the sitting room and up the stairs to the bathroom. By the time he entered the cold room she lay on the floor staring up at the ceiling, her dress pulled up to her stomach and her legs clenched tightly together as if she was trying to hold the child in. Blood stained her dress, legs and panties, dark and sticky filling the bathroom with a sick metallic scent. He'd pulled her up gently and found her eyes with his own afraid to affirm what he knew was happening. He wasted no time apparating them directly into 's as his wife stared blankly into space. It was like he was holding a shell of a woman because she would not speak, she would not react and she hardly tried to support the weight of her own body._

 _Hermione had lost a part of herself with that baby. She drew in weak breaths and listened to countless apologies from healers, from her friends, and from her husband. These apologies were nothing to her, nothing was anything in that moment as she pined for the child that had vacated her body merely eight weeks into her pregnancy. She mostly blamed herself for not being more careful and she resented her husband for getting her pregnant in the first place. Why would God give her a baby she could not keep? She did not understand and did not want to understand. All she wanted was her baby back in her womb._

 _"_ _Please" She pleaded with the sky "I want to love him so badly, I want to be his mummy so badly!" her cried were not unheard as a glimmering figure stepped around the garden's fountain_

 _"_ _Who is it child? Who is it you want to love" the figure was blindingly bright, so much so that Hermione could not see a face_

 _"_ _Orion. My son" She offered weakly_

 _"_ _I can help you. Will you allow me to help you Hermione Malfoy?" the voice asked gently_

 _"_ _Yes! Yes please help me!" Hermione rushed forward eagerly almost colliding with the light_

 _"_ _Okay child. Close your eyes" Hermione did as she was told and the light enveloped her as the figure stepped forward_

 _Gaiea of the Moon wrapped her hands around Hermione's head and leaned forward to blow moon dust over the woman's tired face. She released Hermione and stepped back sheathing herself once again in the light she had been shrouded in._

 _Hermione's eyes were blank for a moment but she blinked and something flashed through those brown orbs before she spoke again. Gaiea extinguished her light and ducked behind the fountain._

 _"_ _Where the hell am I?" Hermione was saying to herself_

 _Oh no! Gaiea thought panicked "I used too much!"_

 _As Hermione turned to look at the house she was unfamiliar with now, Gaiea snapped her fingers and watched as the witch dropped to the ground, asleep. She bit her lip, deciding she couldn't exactly fix her mistake, and snapped again so that Hermione would disappear from the garden and reappear in her bed._

 _Draco had not heard the door but he did hear his wife upstairs milling about the bedroom so he assumed she had reentered quietly as to avoid him. He was trying to help her, really he was, but he had lost his temper tonight when he offered her Orion and she flat out refused to hold him. He dragged a hand down his face and sighed, not noticing that the charmed dragon on his desk was roaring and dancing about trying to get his attention. The little dragon was charmed to alert him every time Orion had woken up. He leaned back in his chair and swept his gaze over the desk just as the little dragon blew a tiny plume of fire at him._

 _"_ _Oh!" He jumped up and bounded up the stairs knowing that Hermione was probably ignoring the babe_

 _"_ _Daddy's coming Ry" he called, he knew the child could not understand what he was saying but he'd hoped that the sound of his voice would at least calm his son_

 _He went through the bedroom, noticing the bed was mussed and his wife was not in the room, and pushed the door to Rys nursery open. There was Hermione! Holding Orion! Salazar's sweaty balls his wife was willingly holding their son!_

 _"_ _Oh mummy's got you" he relaxed and smiled at the sight before him. Hermione gently replaced Orion in his crib and without turning to acknowledge him promptly hit the floor in a faint._


	7. Chapter 7

**Disclaimer**  
This is based on the characters and world created and owned by JK Rowling.

A/N: Hey guys, I'm back! Sorry I was away so long but it won't happen again, I promise! This chapter does contain a sex scene but it can be skipped if that offends your sensibilities.

 ** _Green Eyed Lana Lee:_** Hello dear, Narcissa _is_ unkind but not really hateful. I disagree with the notion that Narcissa would be this super loving, nurturing mother figure to Hermione. She's stuck in her ways but her love for Draco breeds a contemptuous sort of tolerance of our dear Mione. As always my honey thank you for the kind words!

 ** _HisBrokenAngel91_** : *hugs* You, and people going through something similar, are the reason I wrote this. So many people think we can just cheer up but its so much deeper. Please continue reading. I seek to invoke feelings with my writing and if one of those feelings can get you one inch closer to healing then all the hours invested and fretting over these chapters is well worth it.

* * *

He pinched the bridge of his nose as he regarded the wizard in front of him, "Theo you're damn lucky my moral compass is weak"

"Mate you were brilliant! An illegal trace on my wand?! Bloody aurors are getting sloppy, yeah?" Theo was positively glowing in the aftermath of his trial

"Thank my wife for that one. Stay out of trouble, yeah? I'll see you next week mate, I've got to go secure a portkey, Mrs. Malfoy and I will be spending the night in Italy"

"Italy? Ry's gonna be a big bruv so soon?" Theo teased

"Hell I hope not" Draco rolled his eyes and shook his mate's hand, departing down the hallway toward the lifts.

* * *

"So you see grandmother, I need to restore those memories, can it be done?" Gaiea asked from her kneeling position at her grandmother's throne

"Yes child, simple actually. You need only to wait until she sends another prayer. Blow into her face, dust from the southside of the moon. You will undo what you have done."

"Oh thank you! Thank you!" Gaiea exclaimed momentarily forgetting her manners

"Go child, go and remedy her" Her grandmother smiled and with a snap of her fingers Gaiea was gone.

* * *

 _Per Sempre Caldo_ was wizarding Italy's premier resort, charmed to boast sunny skies and warm breezes all year long. Situated in Lecce between the Adriatic and Ionian seas, it was a secret kept between only the richest of wizarding families. The Malfoy name may have been disgraced in Britain following the war but everywhere else money spoke volumes and Draco Malfoy was still obscenely rich. Securing a suite the same day was a privilege reserved only for the wealthiest of visitors.

"Sweetheart he will be fine, Mathilda is very capable of caring for him"

"Yes, yes" his wife waved him off as she fussed over Ry's kicking feet trying to put socks on them

"We should get going, portkey activates in about three minutes" he prodded gently

"Okay Mathilda he has plenty of milk, please continue reading _Gilbert Grapley's Guide to Dreams_ to him as we are on chapter two and I know he is enthralled, and he doesn't like socks on his feet but his toes tend to be so cold so make sure he doesn't scoot them off" Hermione rambled as she planted kisses all over Orion's face and neck.

"Hermione" Draco warned gently grabbing her elbow

"Yes, yes I'm coming. Bye Ry, mummy will miss you" Ry rewarded his mothers sweet words with a yawn

"He's tired of you" Draco pointed out flatly, his wife leveled a glare at him and snatched her arm away

He laughed and pulled her against him by her waist as the portkey pulled them away to the posh, sunny resort. They landed in the lobby and Draco led her to the large marble desk, checking into his reservation. After they'd gotten to the impossibly luxurious room he'd shooed her into the bathroom to dress for their dinner reservation.

His wife, in that outfit, was going to kill him dead. She stood there fidgeting under his gaze as he drank her in greedily. Her mass of curls were pinned to one side, her jewelry was light and demure, and that purple silk pencil skirt was hugging her shapely hips in a way that was sure to tighten his trousers if he kept staring. Her maroon blouse looked like a second skin as it dipped low giving him a delectable view of her milk swelled cleavage. She gave him a sweet half smile as she stepped forward.

"Do I look okay?" She was practically purring as she circled him to put of her thin strapped heels

"Woman, if we don't leave this room at once I will be eating you instead of duck confit"

She laughed sweetly though he size of his pupils let her know he was very serious. She took his offered arm and they made their way down to the adjacent restaurant.

"Un tavolo sulla terrazza" Draco said surprising his date with the fluent use of Italy's tongue

"Sì, proprio così" the young, polished maitre'd led them through the restaurant and out to the warm terrace overlooking the sparkling Adriatic

"Draco this is beautiful, did you really bring me here?" Hermione breathed sweeping her honey gaze over the beauty that was Italy

"Of course Bellissima" He smiled

"Every time you smile I don't doubt that I was utterly in love"

"You are my life pet, and if I have to spend the rest of it reminding you then so be it"

"What did we talk about the first time we were here"

"We argued " he laughed "I can recreate this exactly if you'd like?"

"No!" She held up her hands "We can make a new memory"

"Posso avere il piacere di darti da mangiare stasera?" A waiter had appeared at their table side ready to take their dinner order

"Shall I order for us?" Draco asked her politely

"By all means" she gestured toward the menu

"Vino Rosso. Le cinque portate, confit d'anatra, finiscono con il tiramisù" He handed the waiter their menus and the wiry fellow was off with a courteous nod

"Do you enjoy your work?" Hermione asked conversationally

"Enjoyment is not why I am an attorney. Its my penance. After the war I was required to find something that could do some good in the wizarding world. Admittedly before you I wasn't very good at it" he explained as the waiter returned with a bottle of red wine

"Oh?" She raised a perfectly arched eyebrow

"I was missing the passion. You lit my soul on fire and for that, all of my clients are forever indebted to you" he laughed

"Me?" She asked shyly, unable to reconcile the woman she felt like with the woman he knew

"Yes you" he reached across the table and took her hand in his, long fingers stroking the soft skin of her palm

"I must admit that the woman you know and the woman I am are, or at least seem to be, two different people" She shook her head slightly disturbing her curls

"The fire in you had dimmed but it was not put out wife, I married a powerhouse, the brightest witch of our age, and a damn good woman. You'd had men that didn't understand who you were. I understand you perfectly although you are a bit grating to a sane man's nerves sometimes" He winked at her

"So charming" she rolled her eyes but she was grateful for his assessment

Dinner progressed into easy conversation, and the first four courses had them fully sated and when dessert was placed between them Hermione bravely picked up the tiramisu and held it to his full lips. He smirked at her before accepting, wrapping his lips around her fingertips before pulling away. She bit the corner of her bottom lip and did not miss how his heated gaze dropped to her mouth, no doubt imagining pressing his own to them. He returned her gesture and she playfully nipped his fingertips as she accepted the dessert into her mouth.

"Wife" he growled low in his throat

"Yes husband?" Her response was breathy as she watched him through her lashes

He cleared his throat and stood from the table extending his hand for her take. She was nearly dancing with excitement as she stood and took his offered hand. He was walking so fast she was damn near running to keep up. His large hands had lifted her up and launched her toward the downy bed, giggles erupting from her as her back connected with soft cotton.

"Oh Mr Malfoy, I'd like you to know that I don't usually do this on the first date" she smirked watching him undress

"No judgement pet" he played along as he left a trail of hot kisses up her thighs

The silk of her skirt cooled the skin of her legs as he dragged it down, he hooked a finger in the lace of her panties, tilted his head to consider the scrap of fabric, and with a growl that washed her cunt in liquid arousal ripped the garment from her

"Hey those were expensive!" she complained

He gave her a pointed look and continued his ministrations without answering. He pulled her shirt aside and took a pebbled nipple into his mouth and sucked gently before falling into a fit of laughter.

"What?!" She was alarmed at his reaction

"Well, now I know why Orion is so greedy" He pulled her against him and captured her lips

She could taste the sweet milk on his tongue and smiled against knowing now that he'd inadvertently drank a little of her breastmilk. He continued to kiss her deeply, her face caged in his hands. He pulled away to peel her shirt off and marveled at the body that had carried and bore his child. He licked and nipped every inch of her heated skin egged on by the moans sounding off above his head.

He moved down her body taking her clit into his mouth and sucking fiercely until she had fistfuls of his hair in her hands and his name on her lips. Stars burned behind her eyelids as she sucked in much needed oxygen. He caught her bottom lip gently between his lips and entered her soaking passage with a guttural groan. Moans were spilling from him involuntarily as he moved between his wife's pillowy walls. She arched into him, feeling the muscles in his back tense and relax under her fingertips as he braced his weight on his palms. Something in her abdomen snapped and the most intense orgasm she could remember tore through her insides and set her on fire as she screamed into the starlight charmed ceiling. Her screams were the catalyst for his undoing as he spilled his seed against her quivering womb.

"I've got to tell you" she spoke softly against his sweat slicked shoulder "I love Italy in the summer"

* * *

Later, as Draco slept, Hermione stood on the suite's balcony staring out into the black waves crashing against sand blanketed in darkness. A salty breeze blew her gauzy gown around her legs and her knuckles were white against the railing as she gripped it tightly. Her face was tear stained and her eyes here heavy with more unshed.

Something so fundamental was missing in her and she could no longer ignore it. The love she was giving Orion seemed so simpering and empty, only there because she knew that was the right thing to do as his mum. He was the sweetest thing in the world but she knew without those memories she would never be able to love him as fully and properly as he deserved, she had to work through the hurt.

A wretched sob escaped her as she struggled to pull anything, _absolutely anything_ , forward so that she could dig through the mud to find acceptance , to grieve, to close chapters that hindered the completion of the book of Hermione. Her former self had felt grief so deafening that it halted her life yet the world continued to spin. Orion had still been conceived while, she assumed, she had pretended to be okay.

Suddenly she was shaking with anger, cursing whatever had robbed her of the opportunity to properly sift through the muck of emotions. She had not been the mum Orion deserved before her memory was taken but she was still not the mum he deserved. She cried heavily into the night until a pair of strong arms circled her waist and pulled her into a hard chest. He did not speak, did not turn her to face him but when she felt the splash of his tears on the skin of her shoulder she knew he was sharing her grief. He held her tightly trying with all his might to absorb her pain. As his magic enveloped her she calmed and relaxed into him, thanking him quietly for shouldering her pain so that she wouldn't break.

* * *

Italian conversations...

 _"_ _A table on the terrace" Draco said surprising his date with the fluent use of Italy's tongue_

 _"_ _Yes, right this way" the young, polished maitre'd led them through the restaurant and out to the warm terrace overlooking the sparkling Adriatic_

 _…_

 _"_ _May I have the pleasure of feeding you tonight?" A waiter had appeared at their table side ready to take their dinner order_

 _"_ _Red wine. The five courses, duck confit, end with the tiramisu" He handed the waiter their menus and the wiry fellow was off with a courteous nod_

 _…_

 _Bellisima = Beautiful_

 _Per Sempre Caldo = Forever Warm_


End file.
